Blog Connect: Am I Walking the Walk AND Talking the Talk?

I BELIEVE THIS QUOTE WHOLEHEARTEDLY!

I always say that I do it differently than everyone else and I just don't know how to do it any other way... I have opinions about myself, my life and how I want to move through this world. I can only control and take care of me. My lifestyle may not be right for others, but I offer up my thoughts and share my journey. I think it is helpful to share, so that people can see that others have had struggles, have worked through life's issues and been successful. 

I am walking the walk and talking the talk. I truly live what I talk about. I have my opinions about Networking and Mutual Collaboration. They are not in alignment with everyone else. I am very solid about the foundation of what I am talking about, and how it can benefit everyone. That is how I live.

I have been a  super connector my entire life. 

I connect people with other people and resources on a daily basis. I never think twice about it. That is the way that my brain works. I love to see people succeed. If I can see a way for them to do that... I want to help. I LOVE it! That is why I like the X Factor and those types of shows. 

Not for the humiliating part... But, the joy and success aspect of the shows.

I have always been one to celebrate other's success. 

I can never, ever remember seeing someone succeed or have good fortune and thinking to myself..."What about me?" I have had friends and colleagues struggle with this and I didn't judge, but didn't really understand that space. I don't know if it is jealousy, envy, or another emotion. 

As one of my friends said to me not long ago... "Kimberly, you are running with the big girls." I guess I thought to myself, I don't really think of people like that...
This isn't new. This is my life.
I just have never thought that way... I measure people differently.

However, I had a new experience this week. 

I am surrounded by an enormous amount of very successful women; which means that many are far more successful than I am, in one way or another. That doesn't bother me. I love it. It doesn't intimidate me. I love it. I never compare myself. I just don't do that.
I am super proud of them and want to support them.

These women are already successful & I am a natural Connector... How does that interact with my own desires and dreams? 

That is what I was faced with this week. I have some great connections. I can hook up some high powered women with resources. I haven't done it for myself to date... I honestly haven't been ready. Now that I am on that edge and ready to make those leaps..???

What about Me?  What am I Doing for Me?

So... this is what happened. I connected someone I know, with someone else that I pitched a tv show to. He didn't help me, but is helping her get a radio show. Honestly, that stung a little. It surprised me that it stung, or that I even gave it a second thought. Truth is my idea was great, my pitch sucked. She is in a different place and is totally ready. I adore her and want her to succeed.

But... What about Me?

Now she needs some other things that are pretty specific and I know people that I can ask for resources. The thing that really blows me away, and I am not proud of it... is that I paused. I didn't jump on the phone, or shoot off an email like I normally would. I thought about what I wanted and if it was right to connect her..

Would that affect me? 

Well... the answer is YES I should connect her. No, it will not affect me and that shouldn't matter anyway. If I am good enough, the things I want will come to me. We are all unique and stand on our own Merritt. There is room for everyone, and it is not until we all believe that, and not try to hold the other person back (which includes doing nothing when you have the ability to do something), but instead try as hard as we can to lift each other up, that we will all be moving forward. There is luck, hard work, talent and Karma... I have ALWAYS believed that. 

I was terribly embarrassed that I stopped to think, "What about me?" I have never in my life thought about life in that way. Not my proudest moment... I am so used to doing things for people that I believe in without them asking... That I paused to wonder who would do that for me...

That is authentic. 

Truth is... I am already surrounded by women that are doing that for me.

I believe that the emotion that took over was Fear. Fear seems to be the dark emotion that pops up for me when I least expect it. The fear that I will not be enough? Maybe. I saw it and put it back in it's place. It doesn't feel good and it's not pretty. I don't live my life that way.

The things on the horizon are Big! I had a momentary lapse based on the fear of the unknown. Without big risk there are no Big rewards. I hope to never have that type of thought again.
It wasn't fun. It was Ugly.

It seemed like a test. 

I didn't like it & it didn't feel like me.


Like most things with me, it didn't last long.
I found my way back to my center pretty quickly. 

I will keep working hard, moving in the direction that I want and supporting those around me as I do.  I will continue to move through life unwavering and consistent...

This was just a minor blip on my journey.

I honestly believe that we can all live our dreams.

Kimberly R Lifestyle by Design 

Designing a life with grace and ease